For this week’s writing response regarding hot topics in middle level education, I responded to the parent involvement topic. While writing my response I thought back on my first year of teaching. I had to sent a student to the assistant principal after she decided to write curse words all over my lab tables with a glue stick. I tried to simply solve the problem by speaking with her and asking her to clean them up. She lost it, cussed me out, so I sent her on her way. I remember speaking with the students’ mother on the phone that evening. The mother was very upset and concerned about all of the changes her daughter was going through. She seemed concerned and didn’t know what to do. Then she asked me “What should I do with her, I need your advice to help be a better mom”. I remember being in shock on the phone. My first response wanted to be, "How the hell should I know, I don't have any kids". It was the first time a parent had asked me for advice. Being a young teacher at the time, I had no idea what to say. I was amazed that a parent could reach a breaking point with their child and have no idea what to do to help. I then realized, this was the first time she had to deal with an adolescent. She was a single mom. Trying to balance work and being a parent. I felt young and unexperienced, but in her eyes I was the expert. Thats when it hit me, in this case I was the expert in dealing with young adolescents. I instructed over 130 young adolescents everyday. This mom needed help, and more importantly, she was able to admit it and ask for it.
Reflecting on this and from the readings I have come to decide that workshops would be an amazing resource for parents. There are many parents who are young, dealing with young adolescents for the first time, single parents, or have not support system. They need to know how to best support their child through their young adolscent development. I found a middle school that offers multiple workshops for parents. http://www.dentonisd.org/52720824152636500/site/default.asp It sounds like they have the right idea and the topics sound great.
Erin,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this story with us! I think it is so important to be a resource for parents as well as students. Working in special education, I need to have a trusting, collaborative relationship with parents of my students. I need to communicate with them on a regular basis, and, because of this- I hear a lot of what is going on at home.
Sometimes this information is very helpful, especially with students who have a history of becoming impulsive and obstreperous. Other times, parents may turn to us, like this mother did to you, and ask for help.
You did the right thing by pointing her in the right direction. Here's my special ed. touch --> making resources and information on disabilities, interventions, and outreach resources available to parents as well..
Maybe schools, at the very least, should have a bulletin board with resources posted for easy access...
Wow, what a story. I agree that the workshops are really great. I am also an advocate for regularly scheduled parent teacher meetings, but at a more deeper level. Not only to discuss how the student is doing academically, but also on mental or emotional level. There needs to be that deeper understanding and mutual respect between the teachers and the parents. They can be a resource for each other and ask each other for opinions and help, the same way this mother came to you for help.
ReplyDeleteErin - where did you find this school?! What an interesting lineup of talks for parents - and all accompanied by free childcare! I'd love to have been present at some of these myself.
ReplyDeleteI saw my share of parents who were at wits end trying to navigate having a boundary-pushing adolescent at home. It's always shocking to hear from parents that they feel out of control and that there's nothing more they can do. Just as much as adolescents need to be aware of the changes they face and how they are still "normal," parents need this reinforcement too sometimes.